I thought the Iceland Air attendant was going to crack me in half when I kindly refused her bottled water 'But it comes directly from our glaciers you naive American twit!'
Look lady, dirty Boston water from the bubbler will always be good enough for me and last year, I lived on a glacier.. and garnished my gin and tonics with Antarctic glacial ice older than jesus.. I'm busy trying to save our earth one plastic bottle at a time here- just trying to practice what I preach- spare me the sass.
I started the flight trying to figure out how a girl with over 10 thousand songs and a taste in music that varies from Erykah Badu to Eric Church with Eddie in between (by the way I'm not sure you can refer to it as a 'taste' in music if you just like everything) can organize her iPod in a way that doesn't suck. I gave up.
The couple next to me were drinking vodka and tomato juice with salt and pepper and watched Where the Wild Things Are which -believe it or not- is even more annoying and weird without sound. While they were falling further in love with each other I was busy being flabbergasted by the Iceland advertisements scrolling before me. ' the most amazing thing about Iceland is not the Nordic LIghts, the powerful glacial rivers or that 30% of the people have a university degree-
it's that more than half the country believes in elves."
First of all, I'm not positive that's something to be unabashedly flaunting as a good thing. Secondly I'm not sure a trip to Iceland is necessary to find a bunch of people who believe in elves- I'll just reserve tickets to the premiere of the Hobbit if I want that. Has anyone even ever wanted that? To be in a room where half the people might actually believe you if you told them you were an elf. Imagine if half of our nation believed in something totally nonsensical … like the effectivity of 'trickle down' economics or, Santa Clause. How do they poll for that anyways "do you have a university degree?" 'yes... Mhmm, what about elves- do you believe in them?" 'Gotcha'.
Oh how the mind wanders when stuck sitting stationery surrounded by silliness with nobody to sip V8 vodka and snuggle with whilst watching Wild Things (someday!)- Oh god here they come again with the damn glacier water…*shuts laptop and pretends she's asleep*
Next stop: England.
Listening to: Folsom Prison- Johnny Cash